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| “Why do nature allow us to love people that could not possibly last a lifetime?” |
| 06.04.04 (5:09 am) [edit] |
|
Soon after that happened, another turning point has to be made. My cousin and my aunt who are with us for like 10 years and so had to leave. I said to myself, this is it. Even though it was expected, when the moment actually comes you know deep down inside you that you’re not really prepared. I can feel the tension in everyone here in the house. Like I am, the atmosphere was melancholic for days. It was soo hard. I’ve been crying all out for every damn nights. Then came one ordinary day when my sister and I were talking. The issue just suddenly popped out. We talked about it. The things that are happening lately that would always leave us questions. She said, “ang pinaka-ayoko sa lahat ung nagpapaalamanan eh, naiirita ako..” And it’s true. I almost cried though I tried hard not to show it. “Why do nature allow us to love people that could not possibly last a lifetime?” I always ask this. Why do we have to experience to aches of goodbyes? Why can’t we learn that every Hello’s follows Goodbye’s? I remember what Jim Paredes told me, “Michelle, simply because that’s the nature of things” Maybe he’s right. But still we don’t always hesitate to welcome something. With arms wide open. I won’t forget a line from a book ‘Praying Our Goodbyes’ by Joyce Rupp that trailed in me; Goodbyes are a part of everyday life. Sometimes we choose them. Sometimes they choose us. Usually they are small, not so significant looses. But at times they are deep, wound, powerful experience that would leave us a hollow feeling someplace deep inside. Thru that I’ve learned that it’s actually a Hello-Goodbye-Hello Pattern. When one door closes, another one opens. One more thing, with all these goodbyes there’s always a lot of regrets at the end. It’s true that the things left undone and words left unsaid are the most painful. That’s why we should always cherish the things that are coming in our way. Whether it may be good or bad. And embrace its warmth while it’s still there. We just really have to go with the flow. And to pray and always reboot. |
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